On this week’s episode of “The War”, there’re two segments about Americans speaking. The first one’s about how they can’t understand English and the second’s about how they’ll speak to death, given the chance. Enjoy:

Two updates to previously-posted articles, both strikingly recent:

As posted on the 8th, a Thai mother – Rita Ariyaratnam – killed her two babies and attempted to kill herself but survived her own over-dose. Today she was charged with the murders at a bed-side hearing where she’d recently come off of life-support. The Sunday Times

The cocaine post from just yesterday has been blown out of the picture by news that surfaced today about some Mexicans who imported 144kg of the same white gold with a value of over $30MM. The drugs arrived at an Artarmon address on the 28th of January and then moved to Castle Hill on the 6th of this month, being tracked by the Federal Police since entering the country. Three men were arrested on the 8th. The North Shore Times

Uncle Scam’s knocking Australian products and under-cutting to kill competition in the U.S. market. Californian vintner Fred Franzia is buying up our wine and planning to re-label it as “Down Under” and sell it in the states at less than half of the price of Australia’s successful Yellowtail-brand wine. Franzia will be selling the Australian juice at $2.99 per bottle with the highly-imaginative slogan “three dolla(sic) koala”.

"It’s time that the American consumer paid the correct price for Australian wine. They’ve been overpaying for it. We’re trying to straighten out Australia, then who knows where the next country is, the next opportunity." said Franzia.

This is a tricky scenario because Australian products are still being sold but it’s under-cutting our own market and distribution. As always, it’s recommended to buy Australian wine but now more than ever, to steer clear of Californian wines which – from next month – will already be getting a cut of Australian money.

Herald Sun

A Jew York Jew has been charged with assault in Australia. The rapper, Ron “Necro” Raphael Braunstein initiated a scuffle in Perth, where the rapper was to perform that night. A man was sitting, having a drink at a café and asked what Braunstein was looking at then recieved the response “I can look at who I fucking want” after which Braunstein punched the man repeatedly, fracturing his cheekbone as the jew’s guard jumped in to help the rapper. The victim fled and the rapper and guard went back to their hotel where they were questioned and detained by police over-night thus missing the Perth performance for which 400 fans had waited. For standing his fans up over the attack, the generous rapper had to say for himself; “I love my fans, I’m going to send them a personal response online”. Skipping the Perth date of the tour cost the promoter $50.000 but the tour will go on in Adelaide, New Zealand, Norway and then back to the USA. The rapper spent the night in gaol and was charged $3.000 but not surprisingly still has his working visa after aggravated assault.

The much-hated, ex-CEO of Telstra Sol Trujillo has returned to North America with $31MM, his tail between his legs and accusations of racism. In an interview with the BBC, he referred to Australia as in a sad state and as “backwards” when compared to the USA. Even the liberal Kevin Rudd was attacked by Sol as being racist because he said “adios” to Sol’s border-jumping back to The States.

The Daily Telegraph